planetdan

Thursday, July 21, 2005 :::

Huffin'

One of my favorite movies is Citizen Ruth, in which Laura Dern plays a dim-witted pregnant huffer who becomes the key pawn of a ridiculously escalated abortion controversy. It's a lot funnier than it sounds. Especially her Pavlovian response when she hears the familiar clack clack clack of a shaking spraypaint can. Anyway, my point is that I know huffin' ain't supposed to be funny, but sometimes it just is, like in the case of this huffer's mugshot, found on The Smoking Gun:

I wonder if gold glitter spraypaint gets you higher than regular old black glossy? Apparently he got busted when he went back to the store in this condition for a refill. See? Funny.

I shouldn't judge, though. I must admit I love the smell of permanent markers and Sharpie pens. Which, for non-huffin-related reasons, reminds me of this clever, if not-so-appetizing, advertisement for Bic permanent markers:

I could sit around sniffing them all day long. The markers, not the old lady breastses.

::: posted by dan at 3:14 PM :: [ link ] :: (18) comments

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18 previous comments:

I love that he color coordinated the spray paint to match his wicked ass "warriors" t-shirt. Maybe not a conscious decision, but the right one none-the-less. I think the Queer Eyes would be proud.

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brent, at 4:50 PM

I would have actually placed money on the fact that I was the only person on the planet who ever actually sat down and watched Citizen Ruth. The huffing thing still puzzles me. This guy is just as entertaining as the I LOVE MIDGET PORN guy... http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0714051dui1.html

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Anonymous, at 4:52 PM

actually, the gold does get you more high, ask any seasoned huffer. (i'm not sure about the sparkles)

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hubs, at 4:56 PM

Tough one, but I still think this guy is my fav: http://www.thesmokinggun.com/mugshots/abrackmug1.html

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Monkey, at 5:44 PM

Huffers prefer metallic paint colors because they have higher concentrations of toluene, which is what gets you high.

One of my favorite mugshots is of this seemingly nice lady, who was arrested with her friend for prostitution at an Illinois health spa a few years back. Her name is Kum Nan Cocke. Hmmm.

http://www.co.dupage.il.us/sheriff/CrimeInformation/photos/cocke,%20kum%20nan.jpg

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stsundown, at 6:15 PM

Oh man, the look on that guys face is priceless. I can only imagine the laughs the cops got.
And that sharpie add is a mix of disturbing grossness and brilliant hilarity I didn't think was possible.

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Jake, at 6:23 PM

I just recently watched that movie and thought it was hilarious.

As a side note, I used to work in a grocery store that was frequented by a huffer who by all estimations was certifiably insane. He used to wear that t-shirt with Curious George passed out next an ether bottle (because some drug addictions can be so cute), as he shopped for paper bags and bathroom cleaner and twitched uncontrollably.

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Elle Marie, at 6:29 PM

Hey, maybe the dude was merely trying to get into good old Warrier spirit.

Getting up for the big game, as it were.

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L Man, at 9:20 PM

Can't say I agree with you with the Sharpie thing...but i do love the smell of Crayola crayons, and Play Doh...

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Suz, at 8:06 AM

I'll just agree with the others about the color choice of the spray paint making a difference to the huffers.

I worked at Wal*Mart for about three years at the end of my high school career and on into college. The huffers would always come in and buy gold or silver cans of spray pain and request a paper bag when they would check out. Often times they would have the paint still in their scraggly beards from when they came in before to buy a $1 can of paint. Sad.

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shaunacat, at 8:41 AM

That's so weird, 'cause I thought of 'Citizen Ruth' when I saw the photo too.

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Bewareoftheblog, at 2:24 PM

I loved Citizen Ruth! I actually wanted to buy it a while back, and it wasn't on DVD... but now it is!! I was with one of the other posters... I thought NO ONE had seen this movie. I used to reference it, and people were like "huh"?

Also, I love that picture. He looks so mad. But, he should be glad... gold is flashy. And hot. Hot and flashy. Oh yeah!

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duane, at 3:08 PM

please post something new...
he's scaring me.

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Anonymous, at 11:46 PM

By the way, he also looks like a mix of Jack Nichelson and Bill Murray.

What I see is a lurking evilness in the this man's face, just like in Nichelson's, and the unpredictale sudden lashing out of a Murray psycho. But maybe I done too much sniffing myself.

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Anonymous, at 12:38 AM

My mom works at the SD Department of Social Services and sees many of these characters. The one person that sticks out in her mind is the young mother with 3 kids coming in for food stamps with gold tinted eyelashes and one side of her face drooping like she recently had a stroke. Very sad. Needless to say I am the brunt of much of her graphic "don't do drugs" commentaries. My favorite is when she gives me tours of the welfare office with all of the extremely disturbing anti-drug posters put out by the state.

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Aliecat, at 2:43 PM

Gross.

And I just looked at the similarities between my latest post and this one. It's just wrong, people.

(Though I do enjoy a tiny whiff of gasoline when filling up the tank. But just a whiff.)

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Martingale Jones, at 10:07 AM

dude thats freakin nasty stuff rite there especially the old lady!!

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Anonymous, at 10:47 PM

by the way i agree with that anonymous guy you guys should post something else that guy is reallie scary!

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Anonymous, at 10:49 PM

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