planetdan

Tuesday, August 09, 2005 :::

Belly Button Monkey Anus

I don't have any tattoos. I remember when my friends Stacy and K-Mack went to get tattoos and Stacy came back with a black hole sun smack-dabb in the middle of her forearm. The black hole sun was probably chosen to represent her obsession with grunge music and her favoritest band of all time: Soundgarden; but the forearm placement was a mystery. After she picked the scab while it was healing, I had to take her back to the parlor to get it re-inked and the substitute tattoo artist said "Oooo, it's on your forearm. What a badass," with so much sarcasm that you could almost taste the bitterness. To this day she wears a band-aid to hide it, even though I kinda like it.

Get inked:

• Never ever ever forget.

• Not everybody loves Raymond.

• Belly button monkey anus.

I couldn't find any more info on the Raymond tattoo, which is by far my favorite. If I ever did get a tattoo, it would have to be something totally random and absurd like that, because even tribal armband tattoos were cool at one point. You just never know what's going to end up being embarrassingly, permanently lame.
*cough* tazmanian devil *cough*
*cough* panther clawing at skin *cough*
*cough* dolphin ankle *cough*
Just kidding K-mack.

ps. I wondered if I was the first person ever to use the words "belly button monkey anus" in that particular order, so I googled it and it seems that I was, at least on the traceable internet. So I'm trademarking it. Hands off bitches.

::: posted by dan at 11:41 PM :: [ link ] :: (16) comments

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16 previous comments:

It's a kick-arse phrase. I want it on a T-shirt.

Interestingly, although Google doesn't know "belly button monkey anus", there are 5 hits for "belly button" + "monkey anus".

(though, I should warn, 4 of the 5 are bestiality sites! The other one is "Ashley K's Journal". Poor Ashley K.)

By

alivicwil, at 1:37 AM

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By

alivicwil, at 1:34 AM

The twin towers tattoo reminds me of a guy who I know who got a tattoo in rememberance of September 11th, 2000.

Who knows how both he and the tattoo artist missed that typo.

By

Sean, at 5:43 AM

You know my logic,I wanted to be,hip,and in but I was not limber enough to hike up my leg for the time required to place a rose with thorn tattoo on my ankle,And I certainly did not want to bare any skin even for a bit of shoulder art.So now I have a bad ass motorcycle mama black hole sun reminder each day every day for the rest of my life....I stopped covering it though because I have decided the stigma of a scab that wont heal for years and years,is more so then a big tattoo...and for the record,so there is not any confusion I did not get it because of soundgarden,or the grunge craze...I got it for the even more embarrassing,collection of all things sun and moon.No wonder I get a sun/moon music box almost every holiday...

By

Stacy, at 7:24 AM

If I’m remembering it clearly, which I’m pretty sure I am, Stacy decided against tattooing her ankle because it hadn't been shaved.

Dolphins are still cool. Right? Anyone? It was 1993, get off my back.

I remember that my mom called me asinine. It's a good word.

By

Kristina, at 8:36 AM

Yes they are still cool, or at least thats what I am telling myself everytime I look at it. And yes 1993 was the year of the Dolphin.

By

Kohn, at 9:45 AM

I always wondered if it was indeed a tattoo on Stacy's arm! Thanks for the clarification. It looked like a tattoo but I didn't think she was the type to have one...especially on her arm!

By

Anonymous, at 9:51 AM

I know...I am not the "type" of person to have a forearm tattoo.That's what I think...Back then I thought it was "cool" to challenge the stereotype...now I am scared people will think I like whitesnake.Ummmm,I like Irish music and collect little shoes...actually I don't collect little shoes anymore, but I did while sporting the tattoo.

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Stacy, at 1:21 PM

Hmm...the guy with the 9/11 memorial has so many brown freckles/liver spots/obvious sun damage scars that it almost appears as though you're looking at the twin towers through a bug-splattered windshield. Oh well.

By

Elle Marie, at 3:02 PM

The 9/11 Tattoo, I have no words for. The Ray Romano one is hilarious. I don't regret my tattoo. I got it purely for decorative purposes, because I thought if I got something symbolic and meaningful at the time I'd be incredibly embarrassed about it years later.

Stacy - you are BAD ASS! That's like a neck tattoo!

By

Biglug, at 3:13 PM

Stacy is bad. Bad to bone. Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba-BAD.

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brent, at 4:38 PM

Love the Ray Romano tat. Does wanting a 1950's pin-up tattoo on my back make me a lesbian? Hehe

By

Aliecat, at 5:17 PM

WORLDS of NSFW, but check this out:
http://www.toomuchsexy.org/images/dragon.jpg

Puff The Painful Dragon.

By

Lisa, at 5:55 PM

Scary portrait tattoos ...
http://www.bmezine.com/tattoo/portrait001.html

Don't miss "The Sacred Heart of Mother" on page 6. Why, oh why?

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dave, at 9:21 PM

now, that is one thing I haven't considered, having my belly button be the monkey's ass! how sexy!

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cmhl, at 9:29 PM

The Romano-butt tattoo is actually my tattoo artist.

She's amazing, actually. Her art is colourful and girly, but also really striking.

Anyways, she said she simply wanted him to know she hated him.

Turns out that at the time she didn't have the internet so she doesn't know how it was leaked on the net but now it's everywhere!
No kidding.

Becareful what you ink on yourself kids, it may come back to bite you in the ass!

By

Talie, at 1:30 PM

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