planetdan

Monday, August 01, 2005 :::

It's not the heat, it's the stupidity.

I know that the title to this post is the worst pun ever, but it was like 95 degrees by 9am today. I swear to god that all this heat has totally retarded my brain processes. I honestly stood by the keycard-accessible back entrance of my work this morning and tried to deactivate the card reader with my car remote for like 30 seconds before I realized that building doors cannot be opened with car key remotes. I stood there, all sweaty and slackjawed, just pushing the unlock button over and over again, waiting for the familiar click-clack of the unlocking mechanism, until out of frustration I finally thought "What the fuh, why won't this op..." and then suddenly I snapped back into reality for long enough to get out my card key. If it gets any hotter, I'm going to have to start pinning my name and phone number to my shirt like in the first grade. I hate the hot.

Since it's supposed to be in the 90s tomorrow, too, I better make myself a reminder:

::: posted by dan at 9:20 PM :: [ link ] :: (11) comments

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11 previous comments:

My college band director did the same thing. This man has a doctorate, which scares me a little. It wasn't hot, but he's getting old so his brain's a little addled. At least your brain will eventually go back to "normal" (*snort*)... there's not much hope for him.

The best part was that there was an asssistant band director watching him who could not only risk correcting him, but also could not laugh. He didn't even tell us the story until we were safely in another state.

I'm totally ganking your graphic and sharing it with those who know this story.

Great blog by the way... Ask Stacy about your nationwide readers ;)

By

Kelly, at 10:03 PM

Lay off the sauce, Johnny...maybe that'll work!

By

Kiddo78, at 10:44 PM

ugh. it's been that hot here in boston, too. do you guys have the humidity as well? that's the worst part: walking outside and not being able to breathe throught the smog and heavy air.

bleah.

By

Honey Bunny, at 8:46 AM

My first day of work at the radio station... I saw the owner's wife trying to open the sale department door with her keys much like you were trying to.

To say the least, she was off her meds.

By

jpt, at 9:12 AM

Yes we have the humidity X 10. 15,000 lakes in 100 degree heat will do that do a place.

By

dan, at 1:04 PM

humidity stupidity...that sure as heck explains alot about Texas...

By

pixelala, at 1:11 PM

It's hot in NYC, too. It was so hot on the subway platform I almost curled up and took a nap. Heat makes me sleepy.

By

LA, at 10:00 PM

Heat makes people nasty - believe me, I know, because I live in Memphis. So be careful Dan - don't insult any sweaty motorcyclists.

By

Gina, at 10:33 PM

I've done the same thing numerous times at numerous doors, including my own apartment, parents, and work.

Now that I don't have a car, maybe I'll try sliding my Metrocard in the door jam and expect it to open.

By

jamesdamian, at 1:22 PM

wuss. Try living in Houston for the month of August and get back to me.

By

Anonymous, at 5:19 PM

Ooh! Ooh! Pick me, I have a "how humid was it?" story...sort of. I used to live in Columbus, Ohio and in the summer there it would get so hot and humid that simply sitting on the toilet would cause major sweating and torturous uneasiness.
God that makes me laugh.

By

Elle Marie, at 5:56 PM

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