planetdan

Wednesday, July 12, 2006 :::

Big Boned

I've been feeling a little heavy in the gut area lately because my over-burdened work schedule hasn't allowed me to jog lately, and because I generally eat like a sow. Then I saw this horrifying obesity Flash presentation about fat Americans:

Click here to view it, fatty.

Apparently, "morbidly obese" is defined as having a BMI of 30 or more, or basically being 30 pounds or more overweight. So then I got curious about my ideal weight, so I looked it up, and according to the chart and factoring in my measly height of 5' 7", my ideal weight would be around 135. I generally tip the scales at about 160, which would mean I was a scant FIVE POUNDS AWAY from being "morbidly" obese. But these figures were all based on "frame" size, so I found a chart to determine if I was of small or large frame, and it turns out that this can be determined by measuring ones elbow. So I did, and it seems that scientifically, I would be categorized as "large" framed, or "big-boned" (Ahem, *cough*). According to the charts, this allows me to have an ideal weight of 155. Phew. I've generally considered myself to be of the smaller, scrawny variety of human being, so all of this self discovery was really rather disconcerting today.

By the way, DO NOT do a google image search for "morbidly obese". Nothing good will come of it.

I shouldn't have eaten that Dairy Queen Blizzard for lunch. Of course, it only takes a few seconds with Photoshop's "liquify" tool can help me feel a little better about myself:

Mmmmm, deviled eggs. Ewww, sausage fingers.

::: posted by dan at 11:56 PM :: [ link ] :: (18) comments

Comments are Closed On this Post

18 previous comments:

Oh chunky planet dan is pleasantly plump! If I go by my BMI I am pushing the obese envelope. It's enough to make me want to talk to Traci Gold for diet tips.

By

Biglug, at 7:08 AM

Not to criticize MSNBC's crack journalism, but don't men and women have a different BMI index? I would think that 135 at 5'7" would be good for a woman, but not a big hunk of beefcake such as yourself.

By

Anonymous, at 7:24 AM

You know the previews for that dumb-looking Adam Sandler movie where he controls real things with a remote control? Well, someone i know has a similar real-life photoshop liquify, and they've been practicing with my gut.

By

benny, at 8:16 AM

I’d still be your friend if you let yourself get to that point, but you’d need to save me a least one piece of cake!

By

Kristina, at 8:23 AM

Are you really only 5' 7"? Is Traci Gold huge? where have I been?

By

toddbee, at 12:13 PM

I am so,soooooo glad I had a salmon spinach salad for lunch. I cannot belive for a mihute you are big boned Dan. I can't decide if I would rather be described as fat or big boned neither is very flattering but at least if you are fat you can think you can diet your way to a small frame.I seriously do not buy those charts for a minute. i am supposed to be like 115 or something and there is no way that is even remotely healthy looking for me.

By

Stacy, at 12:33 PM

Amusing for sure, but that deviled egg picture looks disturbingly like my ex-boyfriend. And I'm not sure what part of that comparison I'm the most uncomfortable with...

By

Elle Marie, at 2:31 PM

of course I'm from one of the dark red states. damn.

I am as well classified as big framed, and i wouldn't argue, granted i am freakishly tall too...

By

the other sarah, at 3:16 PM

Yay! I'm moving from a red state to an orange state! There's hope for me yet!!

By

Darcy's Twin, at 4:12 PM

5'7" is a very cuddly height. I love Dan all fat n s*#t! Keep eating Dan, these pics just make me wanna squeeze you.

By

Anonymous, at 4:57 PM

Anonymous is right, 135 for 5'7" is the weight for women. The whole BMI thing seems to leave gender difference out of the equation.
Also, I think you're confusing obese with morbidly obese, Dan. The article say a BMI of 30 or above is obese, not morbidly obese. A morbidly obese BMI starts at 40.
Of course, using the term obese is suprising to most Americans. Here's the deal: obese is what most people would consider just overwieght. Morbidly obese is what most people consider obese.

By

Sissy, at 5:48 PM

Sweetie, don't be so hard on youslef. The term morbid obesity refers to patients who are 50 - 100% -- or 100 pounds above -- their ideal body weight. Alternatively, a BMI (body mass index) value greater than 39 may be used to diagnose morbid obesity.

By

Lolie, at 8:03 PM

why is no one picking up on dan's reference to being "big-boned" in its truly phallic reference?

By

Anonymous, at 2:21 PM

BMI is a crock of shit. BMI is based on weight alone. Just weight. It makes no distinctions for age. It makes no distinctions for muscle mass and it doesn't even distinguish between male and female. This rigid measurement is being aggressively 'sold' to Health Care professionals as 'more convenient' than the weight charts.

It also puts 55 percent of the American people 'at risk' because of 'obesity' since anyone with a BMI over 24 is considered 'at risk', weightwise. Yes, that includes the President (overweight) and Vice President (obese).

Hell, all our beloved athletes are "obese", according to the BMI scale.

See? Crock-o-shit.

By

Honey Bunny, at 5:36 AM

I love honey bunny

By

Sissy, at 7:14 PM

would 148lbs be a healthy weight for a teen who is 5"7 and a half and big boned?!?!?

respond ASAP

By

Anonymous, at 2:30 PM

That pic with the fireworks, looks like John Goodman, or comedian Todd Glass.

There are updated BMI charts out there that distinguish between male and female, and account for muscle mass.

According to those, I am actually underweight for my height, though I feel like I have a baby in my belly.

Either way, 'carpe diem, you look hot' in your other pics.

By

Big Daddy, at 7:47 PM

I'm just normal. My BMI is 23.

By

*_olivia_*, at 1:39 PM

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