planetdan

Wednesday, November 26, 2008 :::

Juicy Turkey! Sumptuous Ham!

I was driving down the freeway the other day in the freezing cold and I saw a truck pass on my right with some detached tarps flapping up in the wind. Underneath those flapping tarps I could see hundreds of stacked cages stuffed tight with alive-yet-partially-frozen turkeys, all looking retarded and confused and miserably cold. It made me a little sick, and I'm usually not even that much of a bleeding heart when it comes to animal food.

Then I came across this graphic on the web which details the complicated machining process that brings said turkeys from the farm to your table this Thanksgiving holiday:

Click for Larger

Appetizing, indeed!

Then on top of that, a very thoughtful coworker sent me this article about how eating ham can give you tapeworms. And worse yet, unhygienic people who eat undercooked ham can give you BRAINworms. Charming. And lovely. I'll sleep well tonight!

So I guess Ham is off the menu now, too.

It's a good thing that my family has Lasagna for Thanksgiving.

Sorry I had to share all that with you but it didn't seem fair that I had to endure all that hurl-worthy barfiness by myself. Now we can all suffer together, collectively. Just how Thanksgiving was meant to be. Happy Thanksgiving!

::: posted by dan at 12:08 PM :: [ link ] :: (6) comments

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6 previous comments:

Yuck! Thanks Dan for spoiling my gluttony.

By

Isabell, at 10:52 PM

Is that the same way tofurkeys are made?

By

Anonymous, at 12:21 AM

Is there a schematic for the production of Madam von Bighair's hair?
~Otimak

By

Michelle, at 10:37 AM

Unfortunately there was no Madam von Bighair sighting this year as we didn't make it to the Barnacle Bills. I'm sure she had a lovely coiffure and an even lovelier all-you-can-eat turkey platter, though.

By

dan, at 8:44 AM

Yeah but lasagna is made with beef, which has the potential to carry mad cow alzheimer's disease. You're screwed no matter what.

By

me, at 12:53 PM

Why do their necks need to be broken if their heads have already been cut off??

If that lasagna has ground beef in it... well, you probably don't want to know. Enjoy!

By

pinstripebindi, at 6:06 PM

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